


5 AM

by neurotrophicfactors



Category: Persona 3, Persona 4
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Depression, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Non-Sexual Intimacy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-04
Updated: 2017-08-04
Packaged: 2018-12-10 20:54:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11699736
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neurotrophicfactors/pseuds/neurotrophicfactors
Summary: This happens sometimes. Not often, but once in a while Minato’s bad days will hit a peak and he doesn’t know what to do with himself, so he just takes a bath.‘The warm water feels nice, I guess,’is what Minato told him the first time Souji found him camped out in the bathtub. By that point Minato had been sitting in there for nearly three hours, refilling the tub with hot water whenever it cooled down.





	5 AM

**Author's Note:**

> I will raise this ship from the grave myself and fill it with my mental health headcanons. Inspired by the song 5 AM by Amber Run... and my own experiences with depression.

The space in the bed next to Souji is empty. Sometime in the last year he became accustomed to sharing it with another person. It became routine: he sleeps against the wall and Minato, who is more prone to restlessness, sleeps on the outside. For that reason, it isn’t entirely unusual for Souji to wake up alone, but when he slides his hand across the bed into that empty space, he finds the sheets cool to the touch. They have been abandoned for some time.

Squinting at the alarm clock on the nightstand, the red digital numbers inform him that it’s quarter-to-five in the morning. Souji closes his eyes and waits for approximately two minutes before he sits up with a sigh and shuffles to the edge of the mattress. He makes his way to the bedroom door slowly, one hand hovering in front of him until he finds the handle and slides it open.

The apartment is dark and quiet. Beyond the hallway, the only source of illumination is the rectangle of moonlight spilling through the window into the living room and kitchen. Down the hall from the bedroom, however, a thin band of light reaches out from the narrow gap beneath the bathroom door like exploratory fingers. Souji flexes his toes against the tatami mat and pads over carefully. He tips his head forward until it presses against the hard wood of the door, grounding him. He closes his eyes and listens for noise.

With one finger, he taps on the door as he calls softly, “Minato?”

There’s the sound of water moving and Minato’s voice says, “Come in.”

Souji has to blink owlishly when he first opens the door as his eyes adjust to the sudden brightness. As expected, Minato is seated in the bathtub, void of bubbles, with his arms around his knees. His huddled position has nothing to do with modesty—Minato has long since gotten over any shyness when it comes to his body. His skin is a pale expanse stretched across lean muscle and sharp bones that jut out from his frame, making him look more fragile than he is. His hair is dry and hanging over his right eye as he looks up to silently acknowledge Souji’s entry.

Souji presses his lips into a tight smile and exhales slowly through his nose as he crosses the room to sit next to the bathtub, leaning against the white tiles of the wall. He rests his forearms on his knees and asks, “How long have you been in there?”

Minato reclines in the bathtub and stretches out his legs, crossing one ankle over the other. “I don’t know. An hour?”

“It’s nearly five AM,” Souji tells him.

“Yeah, about an hour then.”

Souji nods to himself. This happens sometimes. Not often, but once in a while Minato’s bad days will hit a peak and he doesn’t know what to do with himself, so he just takes a bath. ‘ _The warm water feels nice, I guess,_ ’ is what Minato told him the first time Souji found him camped out in the bathtub. By that point Minato had been sitting in there for nearly three hours, refilling the tub with hot water whenever it cooled down.

Minato’s depression isn’t new. He had depression when Souji met him and he’ll have depression five years from now; just like Souji and the anxiety Minato is convinced stems from an obsessive-compulsive disorder. They talk about it, and living with each other has been a learning curve for both of them, but Souji never knows what to do on days like this. Minato has told him that there’s nothing he really _can_ do; it’s just something that needs to pass. It doesn’t sit well with him though. Souji has always been action-oriented. He likes problems that have clear cut solutions, even if it takes time to realize them. Helplessness is not a feeling that suits him, especially when it pertains to the needs of someone he loves. Since he can’t fix Minato’s depression, he copes by providing him with small comforts.

“Are you hungry or thirsty?” Souji asks.

Minato shakes his head and raises one hand to point at the bathroom counter. With his eyes, Souji follows the length of his pruny finger to find an empty glass abandoned next to the sink.

“Do you want to listen to music?”

“It’s fine,” Minato replies, but the way he’s chewing his lower lip means ‘ _yes_ ’, though he doesn’t want to be an inconvenience.

“Can I touch you?”

When he’s at his worst, Minato tends to go one of two ways: he craves touch or he _loathes_ it. Finds it overwhelming and uncomfortable, like a dried sand sculpture that threatens to crumble at the slightest breeze. Right now, though, he’s saying, “Yes,” so Souji reaches over the lip of the bathtub to run his fingers through Minato’s thick hair, scratching his scalp as his boyfriend closes his eyes.

After a moment, Souji stands up, letting his hand fall away. “I’ll be right back; I’m just grabbing my phone, okay?” he says.

Sighing, Minato tips his head back until it rests on the edge of the tub, as if it could substitute Souji’s touch. “Okay.”

Souji suppresses the urge to lean in and kiss his forehead before he makes his exit, leaving the bathroom door open to illuminate his path back to the bedroom. His cellphone is laying on top of their dresser next to Minato’s, a glowing green light informing him that it’s fully charged. He unplugs it and unlocks the screen, opening up his music app as he shuffles across the hall again. He closes the bathroom door behind him as he re-enters and sits cross-legged against the wall next to the bathtub, head bent over his phone. Once he finds the playlist Minato made for him, he puts it on shuffle with the volume down low and sets it aside to look at Minato. His boyfriend is leveling him with a Look.

“What?” Souji asks.

“You should go to bed; you have class in the morning,” Minato says.

He does—in about four hours. Plenty of time for Souji to coax Minato out of the bathtub and catch some more sleep before he goes to learn about biochemistry. That way Minato will rest before his classes this afternoon as well.

“Technically, it’s already morning,” Souji tells him, “and you’re right… But I would rather stay with you.” Unable to resist, he moves over until his side is flush with the bathtub and stretches out his arm to cup Minato’s jaw, running his thumb over his cheekbone tenderly.

Minato stares at him hard for five seconds before he gives in with a sigh, leaning into Souji’s touch and the tiny beginning of a weary smile gracing his lips. Even with dark circles beneath his eyes, Souji thinks he looks beautiful.

There’s the low squawk of flesh sliding against fiberglass and the sound of water splashing as Minato presses close to wrap an arm around Souji’s shoulders. Souji frees his arm from between them and curls it around Minato’s back, uncaring as he feels his sleep shirt grow damp from Minato’s skin.

Minato lets his head roll onto his shoulder and Souji can feel Minato’s breath against his neck as he says, “You’re the worst. I love you.”

Souji smiles and presses his lips to Minato’s temple. “I love you too.”

For a long minute there’s silence aside from the steady rhythm of their breathing and the music that plays on Souji’s phone. Little by little, Souji feels his anxiety melt away, like an ice cube held in a warm palm.

After a while, Minato licks his lips and says, “You should get in the bath with me.”

Without missing a beat: “You look like a raisin. You should get _out_ of the bath with me.”

Minato groans. “You’re a fucking weapon.”

Souji laughs. They’ll get through this together, just like they always do.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed this, and if you want to talk about mental health (headcanons or even just relating), I am Here For This.


End file.
